Five Items of Clothing I’d Sell An Organ For
by Nathan Beesley
Despite all that I preach regarding how easy it is to look good on a student budget, I rarely walk the walk with the same confidence as I talk the talk. Perhaps that’s why I’m banging away at my keyboard in a darkened room while watching a documentary on the Herero Genocide, while the rest of you are probably out drinking absinthe out of a scantily clad ladies ass crack, or whatever ‘normal’ young people do these days.
In fact, until a combination of student loans, work and Christmas funds bailed me out, I was seriously in debt. The problem with a shopping addiction is that shopaholics are treated by society with a sort of wry, patronizing sort of insincerity. While we decry and pity those whose wilfully traded their families and livelihood for a lifelong enslavement to Crystal Meth, shopaholics get a sort of verbal smack on the bottom every now and again and are sent on their way.
The phrase ‘cold turkey’ took on a whole new, somewhat more literal meaning for me last month due to surviving shifts at work by eating leftover Christmas dinner. However, maybe that’s the way forward. I would happily sign up to a programme that shut me in a room with that nice man off Embarrassing Bodies while my debit card was frozen in block of ice and locked away until my contortions and cravings for ASOS sales had subsided.
But forget all of that confessional, self-deprecating nonsense. This is a fashion blog, not the tragic backstory of an X Factor contestant with an overly sentimental Take That track playing over the top. With that in mind, here’s a list of the five items of clothing I’d happily exchange the entirety of my bank balance, my dignity and my bone marrow for.
1. Loake Cannon Double Monkstraps (£195)
As far as dress shoes were concerned, Double Monks were the big thing in 2012 and there’s no indication of them slipping off the style radar anytime soon. This particular pair is an exercise in minimalist perfection, with a mouth-wateringly slim silhouette and a wonderful colour.
2.Burberry London Twill Trench Coat (£795)
I recently invested in a lovely mac-meets-trench coat this year by Reiss, but let’s face it, when it comes to the iconic outwear style, Burberry reign supreme. This particular style is synonymous with stylish gents like Steve Mcqueen and Humphrey Bogart and, come on, who doesn’t want to just be those men in every single way?
3. Alexander Mcqueen Double-Breasted Blazer (£1, 160)
What I love about this piece is that it’s so uncompromising. Where other contemporary designers have cut double-breasted jackets so short they actual lose some of their classic appeal, the cut of this piece manages to look both timeless and fashion forward. Those wide lapels and the golden buttons hark back to another time, and yet the slim silhouette it creates just screams European affluence. Warning: Paired with white trousers and some Loake Cannons, this blazer could have the effect of inducing all women within a mile into an orgasmic seizure.
(Disclaimer: this may or may not depend on the individual wearing it).
4. All Saints Leather Bomber Jacket (£350)
Few high-street retailers produce better quality leather products than All Saints. While this seasons offerings failed to have the usual wow factor, their leather jackets still look as slick and edgy as ever. I just don’t have the level of testosterone required to pull off a biker jacket, which is why I chose this more subtle bomber design. And the best part? This sort of jacket will only get better with age.
5. Grenson Brogue Boots
I already own five (yeah I know) pairs of brogues, and two of those are boots, but I’ve always longed to own a pair of these. Maybe it’s the colour. Maybe it’s because the brand is steeped in history and renowned for their quality. Maybe I’m a very shallow individual who needs to stop caring about external appearances so much and get a girlfriend.
Yes, maybe that too.